Matt Donnelly’s first appearance on Penn & Teller: Fool Us
Matt Donnelly appeared on Penn & Teller: Fool Us in season six on the CW. The episode aired September 9, 2019. Penn said Matt’s performance was “amazing” and “absolutely killed”.
Transcript:
Allison (host of Fool Us): We’re back and ready for more fools. Here’s one now!
Matt: Hey, I’m Matt Donnelly and I have no business being a professional magician. I started as an improviser, improv comedy. I moved to Las Vegas and as luck would have it became friends with Penn. So I co-host Penn’s podcast and have been doing that that for about six years.
I got into magic on a dare. I kind of was mouthing off and saying like, ‘I should just learn a trick.’ And Penn said, ‘You’re right; you should.’ I basically went to every working magician I knew and asked them if they’d teach me one trick. I started combining my comedy with my magic and it took off quickly.
Piff the Magic Dragon: You do know they do this for a living, right?
Matt: I think it’s hilarious to go on Fool Us and mess with my friends. Do I expect them to be really surprised? Absolutely.
[On stage.]
Allison: Joined by a randomly selected member of our audience, here’s Matt Donnelly, the Mind Noodler!
Matt: Hello, I am Matt Donnelly; I am a mind noodler—which is not a mind reader, it’s like a mind reader plus, okay? First step of of being the Mind Noodler is reading minds. That’s easy, right?
[To audience volunteer] What’s your name?
Morgan: Morgan.
Matt: Morgan. I knew that; I read your mind. No problem. And right over there, I can read Penn’s mind. He’s thinking, what the hell’s Matt doing up there? I can read Teller’s mind; he’s thinking [facial expressions]. Actually Morgan, Teller’s thinking he hates that joke. …Exactly. We’re going to start with something minor. Are you a fan of Penn and Teller, Morgan?
Morgan: Yes.
Matt: So am I. So before we get this experiment started with mind noodling I want to see if we can get a picture with Penn & Teller, okay?
Morgan: Okay.
Matt: Alright, come on up here. Morgan, switch places with me here and I’m going to take a selfie right here and mark this wonderful occasion. Alright here we go; let me in there and… beautiful. Now we’re going to get to mind noodling, okay? Step one of mind noodling is reading your mind. Step two is the noodling part. Do you know what noodling is?
Morgan: No.
Matt: Regular noodling is a kind of fishing where you find a wide-mouth fish and you don’t use a pole; you just shove your whole arm into that fish’s mouth and you yank that muddy puppy out of the water. He stays on your arm, it’s yours. Morgan, that’s what I’m gonna do to your mind.
Morgan: Oh… okay.
Matt: I’m gonna take my own thought and with my mental arm shove into your cat mouth fish brain, okay?
Morgan: Alright.
Matt: So what we’re gonna do is you’re gonna try to think of something and you’re gonna think you thought it, but in fact I thought it and I put that thought in your brain.
Moirgan: Okay
Matt: Okay?
Morgan: Alright.
Matt: Great! Take a look at Teller. I want you to think about how much he weighs. Now Morgan I don’t want to put you on the spot here; I should let you take more of an educated guess. Teller has two pairs of cheeks; go ahead and grab one of his cheeks. … Nope, nope, nope, Morgan, no. His butt, Morgan; grab his butt.
Morgan: Seriously?
Matt: Yes, seriously. … Morgan, you should now have a pretty good idea of what Teller weighs. I know you do because I put that thought in your mind! I don’t want you to say it out loud because that’d be offensive to Teller, to guess his weight out loud to everybody here in this audience, okay? So, you have a calculator on your phone? Open it up and what I want you to do is just go right to the numbers and type in what you think he weighs. I don’t want to look! Just type it in. It’s in? Okay.
Mind reading, success. Noodling, way off. I was off by 16 pounds on that guess but I’ll document for science. Minus 16, there we go. Alright Morgan, you and I are gonna do better in round two, okay?
Morgan: Okay.
Matt: What I want you to do is I want you to take a look at Penn.
Morgan: Are you gonna make me grab his butt cheek?
Matt: I’m gonna make you do even more than that, Morgan. Just go ahead and give Penn a bear hug. Grab him and lift him up. Lift him up! Get that magical yeti in the sky! Go!
Morgan: I don’t think I can.
Matt: I think you can try harder! … Okay. Morgan, you think you have a pretty good idea of what you think Penn weighs?
Morgan: Yes.
Matt: Okay, just hit the plus sign. I don’t want to look; go ahead and enter it into the calculator. It’s in?
Morgan: Okay, yeah.
Matt: Hoo, Morgan, mind reading success and we’re getting much closer on the noodling; I was only seven pounds away from that last guess. You think you guessed Penn’s weight, but your guess was influenced by my noodling and I think we’re gonna nail it on round three. Are you excited for round three?
Morgan: Yes.
Matt: I’m excited for round three. You wanna know why, Morgan? Round three is me.
Morgan: Okay.
Matt: I’ve let you pinch Teller, I’ve let you squeeze Penn; now your choice—free choice—do you want to ride me like a pony, or do you want me to ride you like a pony? … You’ll ride me like a pony?
Morgan: Yes.
Matt: Okay, let’s go. Smart choice, Morgan; I am an amazing pony.
Morgan: Do I actually…
6Matt: Come on, Morgan! … Morgan, Morgan—great job. Okay. Now you should have a pretty good idea of what I weigh now. Yes?
Morgan: Yes.
Matt: Yes?
Morgan: I’m not good with weight.
Matt: Okay Morgan remember hopefully I’m mind noodling so whether you are good with weight or or not doesn’t matter because I put a thought in your brain.
Morgan: Okay.
Matt: Go ahead.
Morgan: Two… 215?
Matt: 215! Two hundred and fifteen pounds. Do you all think Morgan came up with that figure on her own? All of America’s watching, looking at this frame and thinking I weigh 215 pounds?! No Morgan, we nailed it. It’s a full noodle!
Morgan: Okay.
Matt: Oh Morgan, listen I had faith in you. I had more faith in you than you could possibly imagine. I have a prediction that I put in place before this whole thing began. Alright? And I sealed it on my flesh. I want you to hit the equals button on your calculator. And now, out loud, I want you to say that guess for everyone to hear.
Morgan: 580?
Matt: What? What’d you say?
Morgan: 580.
Matt: 580? Okay. Oh wait Morgan we didn’t noodle all the way, right? We had some changes on here, right? So I had minus 16, I had minus 7. that would give me a total of minus 23. And I think 603 minus 23 gives me a total of 580! … Penn, Teller, this trick is completely examinable.
Allison: Matt Donnelly, everyone! … Come here, you know how it works! So what’s it like performing for your friends Penn & Teller?
Matt: You know I started magic basically on a dare by Penn, and so put a preview together, my first magic show. And so I can tell you, don’t do your first magic show—ever—in front of Penn and Teller. Teller taught me a rope trick with a knife, I cut my finger open; I bled all over myself and it did not go well at all. I’m very happy to get back here and least do something pretty good in front of them.
Allison: Alright, let’s see if your friends Penn and Teller figured it out. Penn, Teller, this guy!
Penn: What the hell are you doing, Matt? Matt Donnelly is my co-host on Penn’s Sunday School. We do a podcast together every single week and yet he has been keeping this from me for months, that he’s showing up on this show. ‘Oh I’m learning magic; I’m working on a few new things, Penn; I hope you get to see ’em someday. Won’t that be fun?’ —What tricks ya working on, Matt? ‘Oh you know, just stuff.‘
So you come here after co-hosting my show for what, seven years?! And you’ve got a trick you’re trying to sneak by me? I’ll tell you Matt, it’s amazing. It’s pretty amazing, because beautiful performance that absolutely killed. I gotta tell you it’s astonishing in every single way, but you thinking you can fool us, you rat bastard?! I’ll tell ya, it’s a great trick but it didn’t add up, and if you think you fooled us, I’m gonna punch you in the face. It does not add up. You did not fool us, isn’t that right, Matt?
Matt: Ah, it’s true. But it was my lifelong dream to perform for you guys. That’s not true either, because I just started a year ago! But it was my lifelong dream to be ridden like a pony on national TV.
Penn: Side-saddle!
Matt: So I thank you, and thank you.
Allison: You didn’t fool them, but it was wonderful. Matt Donnelly! … You might think we’re done, but let me dispel that notion right now. More Penn and Teller Fool Us when we return.